Farewell
by Fair Cate
Summary: It’s a journey very few people could understand. It’s a choice very few people have to make. But Sydney and I aren’t like everyone else and sometimes you need to shut some past chapters in your life before you begin a new one... SV


It's been a while guys! This has been sitting in my computer for ages and I just thought I would share it with you! It is set sometime in the future.

Disclaimer - I own nothing

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It's a journey very few people could understand. It's a choice very few people have to make. But Sydney and I aren't like everyone else. We have seen things which have changed the way we look at the world and judgment we pass on others. It makes us consider what is really important and what I know is that I love Sydney Bristow. And so I force myself to attempt to understand why the day before our wedding, when most people are surrounded by family and friends, she needs to visit the resting places of some of the most important people in her life. And I need to go with her.

"There are some people I need to talk to before tomorrow" she stated, standing on the other side of the room as if afraid of how I would react.

The morning had been peaceful, a nervousness under riding every action. I had sensed there was something on her mind from the moment she woke that morning and had been waiting for her to finally let me know what was going on in that head of hers.

"Okay, I'll drive you" I responded, finishing my coffee and reaching for my car keys.

She protested weakly while following me to the car, but I silenced her with a kiss before I opened the car door for her. She directed me through unfamiliar streets and I knew we were coming close when her hand found mine. Within minutes, we pulled into the car park of our first cemetery.

We didn't say anything and I let her walk ahead. She paused in front of a gravestone and I stopped to read the name. Francie Calfo. I watched her crouch down in front of the grave and leant down, placing a kiss on top of her head.

"Do you want me to stay?" I asked, running my fingers gently through her hair.

She shook her head and I knew the tears were already coming. I pressed another kiss on her head before wandering off a small distance.

I hear her murmur slightly and while I can't make out the words, I hear the emotions that accompany them. Francie should be there tomorrow, helping Sydney to get ready, to calm her nerves and to walk in front of her down the aisle as maid of honor. But instead Sydney has to hope that Francie's presence will be with her tomorrow as she wears Francie's favorite necklace that Sydney borrowed from her parents.

She abruptly stood and kissed her fingers, which she then pressed to the tombstone. She backed away thoughtfully for a moment, before walking over to join me. She wrapped her arm around my waist and I happily pulled her towards me as we made our way back to the car. I started the engine before turning to her.

"Where to next?"

The next cemetery was closer and I certainly did not need directions here. She looked at me curiously as I took a shortcut, but let it slide. We got out of the car and she reached for my hand.

"So who are we visiting here?"

She looked away, blushing slightly. "Laura Bristow"

I pause and she takes an extra step before realizing I had stopped.

She sighs before turning and taking a step to stand in front of me. "I know the grave is empty. I know she was just a character. But Laura Bristow was still my mother. She and Irina Derevko, in my mind, are two different people. My mother died when I was a child. And so today I need to say some things to her"

I nod, half understanding. "My father is buried here"

She looks at me with open eyes, brown and innocent. "I didn't know"

I nod. "I know. Maybe I should go and see him today"

She stands on her toes and presses a kiss against my cheek. "I'll find you," she whispers before heading off.

I watch her for several moments before heading in the opposite direction, along what has become a very familiar path.

There are fresh flowers, but I shouldn't be surprised. No doubt my mother has been by to share the happy news with him. I try to find something to say, but instead I can't. So instead I sit and think.

I try to remember my parents and what they were like together. I told my mum once that I could never remember them ever fighting and she laughed. She told me they fought and that my father was by no means a perfect man. But she loved him in spite of it all and that what true love was.

I thought about all the happy memories I have of him and played the familiar slide show through my mind, closing my eyes and taking in the warmth of the sun, the softness of the grass, the peace in the air, the comfort of the memories.

I heard her coming, her familiar footsteps pressing against the grass. I didn't open my eyes, even as she took a seat beside me. She remained silent, allowing me to finish my moment before finally acknowledging her presence.

She grinned at me. "It's a strange feeling, isn't it? Talking to someone who is so alive in your mind, no matter how long it has been"

I nod, taking in what she had said. Maybe she had the right idea after all.

"There is just one other person I need to see"

We stopped at a tiny church-side cemetery not far from Sydney's old apartment.

"Who is here?" I ask as we pull up.

She is silent before replying. "Danny. I just… I need to say goodbye"

She waits for my response and, sick of waiting, she sighs and leaves the car. I watch her walk away and pause in front of a grave on a hill. Her hair is blowing around her face and she doesn't move to brush it away. And instantly I wish I told her I understood why she wanted to come here the day before our wedding. I know that she has always carried the guilt of Danny's death with her, more than anything else she has been through. And I know that she needed to forgive herself for it before she could truly move on.

I open the car door and sit on the edge of the warm bonnet. I watch her stand there for several moments before simply walking away and heading back towards the car. I see the tears on her face from a distance away and I walk towards her, arms outstretched. She falls into my embrace and I hold her while she cries.

No one should have to go through this before what is supposed to be the happiest day of his or her life. And I worry for Sydney all that night, but the moment I see her the next day, my fears are banished. She smiles like she never has before, as if all her burdens are gone.

"I can feel them" she whispers to me as Jack takes his seat, a huge grin on her face. I feel an inner peace about her.

"So can I" I admit, taking her hands in mine.

Maybe most people don't have to go 'visiting' the day before their wedding. But Sydney and I, we aren't most people. And sometimes you need to shut some past chapters in your life before you begin a new one. And I'm glad we had the chance to do that.

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Please review! Thanks, Cate


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